Around Here

I believe we have a case of the post-Christmas cabin fever. We have been mainly at home for the past few days, as the boys are playing with their new toys and the weather has been uninviting to say the least. Although I long for the great outdoors, I have enjoyed watching and playing with the boys. Unfortunately, I have also enjoyed far too much sugar from that cake I made and the stocking stuffer candy (both grandmothers seem quite fond of this approach). I think we will even polish off the Egg Nog tonight.


Evan's birthday is quickly approaching. This is the first time we are experiencing the immediate post-holiday birthday since Evan wasn't even born yet last year. I must say that I do not feel ready to buy birthday gifts and plan a party so soon after Christmas. I am excited about Evan's birthday, and feeling particularly nostalgic about this time last year right before he was born. I fondly recall the excitement leading up to that moment when my water broke, shortly after we went to bed on January 3rd, 2010. I remember a quiet New Year's Eve in 2009, one that was full of anticipation about the joy awaiting us.


As I'm sure many babies do, Evan is ramping up his repertoire of skills as he approaches his birthday. He is standing by himself for longer periods, walks freely while his hand is held, throws a ball, giggle snorts, and says several words. Just the past few days, as I frequently found myself in the kitchen, Evan has said "cook" on more than one occasion. It is likely no coincidence that he has also improved his eating skills and has pretty much mastered the art of eating with two teeth. By the way, where are those other teeth?! Most of all there's that noticeable change of a child who is just more aware of human interaction and the world around him. I love the way he looks over at me whenever he tries or experiences something new.


Benjamin has also developed some new skills. The coolest is his newfound understanding of humor. The latest joke around here is the one where you ask someone, "hey, you know what?", they then say, "what?", and you say, "nothing". We do this back and forth for a while, and Benjamin also enjoys saying, "you got me", or "I got you" afterward. He is also a very sweet boy. Today he accidentally knocked Evan over and made him cry. He then apologized to Evan and, when Evan didn't stop crying, Benjamin spontaneously sang "The Itsy Bitsy Spider" to him to ease the pain. It was precious, and it worked.


We have had some good times over the past week, and we are looking forward to another year of fun with these awesome boys.

Christmas!

I realize that Hawaii has come and gone and there is no post. Rest assured that Hawaii will be covered, but I had to post on Christmas first. For the first time in my life, I understand the idea that Christmastime can be quite tiring and stressful. Maybe it is having two kids, having just gotten back from Hawaii one week before, or a combination of the two. We have gone non-stop since we got back and I am just now feeling like I can take a breath. We always have such expectations of all that can be accomplished during this holiday, and it is hard to live up to them. When I saw the cover of Bon Apetite, I just HAD to make the cake. I knew, but did not know, that it would usurp the small amount of free time that I had. Somehow, the sense of accomplishment and the incredible taste made it worth the extra energy and stress.


This was the first Christmas that Benjamin really began to grasp the idea of Santa and the specialness of this day. He couldn't stop asking questions about Santa. "Why does he come down the Chimney?", "How does he get out of the chimney", "Why does he use a sleigh?". It was also our first Christmas to uphold the myth of Santa with real consistency. I was not ready for this.


This was Evan's first Christmas! It has been about as long as anyone has ever had to wait for one. Although he does not understand the magnitude yet, he has been game for it. Christmas is right up his alley. Evan loves food, loves being together, loves toys, and loves sharing laughter. I found out tonight that he loves prime rib and has an affinity for the kitchen. I was holding him for a bit as I was cooking and he spontaneously said, "cook". I couldn't believe it. I do believe this child has eating/cooking in his bones. He has a good life in store!


Most important of all, I have been ever aware of the true reason behind this holiday. Despite the stress, Christ has been at the forefront of my mind. He is the end all, the be all, the ONE who makes life meaningful and gives up hope for eternity. I pray for all of my friends and loved ones, that they can experience this most awesome gift.

Way Behind

Wow! I guess I am way behind on this blog thing. I've gotten caught up in doing. Doing, doing, doing. We are getting ready for our trip to Hawaii and then Christmas. We were shocked to realize that by the time we get back from our trip, Evan's birthday will only be a couple of weeks away! Speaking of Evan, his advances are very rapid these days. He seems to have grown considerably in just the past month. I was saving some of his 12-month outfits, assuming that they would be too big. Since I've put some of them on him now, it seems as though he has already outgrown them. Evan is also very proud of himself for opening cabinets, and this is now his favorite activity. He makes sure to pull everything out of the cabinet, especially if it might hurt him or be dangerous in any way. We did not seem to have this occur with Benjamin, as I never recall considering cabinet locks. Other recent accomplishments include getting a new tooth (2 now), throwing objects, cruising, dancing, playing with cars, and various new words such as "track" and "doggie". The thing that has really come through in Evan is his persistence. Despite efforts of many to thwart him from his goal, Evan keeps going. I think this is a good sign for his life.


Benjamin is as charming as always, and is now wearing "big boy" underwear. His thought processes and speech abilities are continuing to astound me. I must say, he has been quite a challenge lately, but I think this represents his intense personality. He is getting very busy with pretend play and his frequent requests for our participation in the pretend scenarios can be tiring. The amazing thing is that Benjamin provides so much joy and laughter that we are often just beside ourselves with love. He is looking forward to Hawaii, although he doesn't really grasp the concept of our trip. He does realize that we will be going on an airplane, a boat, AND a submarine! We are all looking forward to the adventure.

10 Months!

Our Little E turned 10 months old yesterday! He keeps racing toward the one year mark. So much has changed in just the last month. He is such a little explorer, always investigating everything in his surroundings. He is also a little chatterbox, babbling all the time and even saying words like "duck" and "doggie" already! He has a sense of humor, and loves when Benjamin plays Peeka Boo with him. Quite the outdoorsman, Evan loves getting close to nature, as you can see he is about to put rocks in his mouth in the above photo. He has a persistent personality, and is not easily thwarted by Benjamin's attempts to reclaim any toy that Evan borrows. We love our little baby moose. Happy 10 months Evan!

Baby Boy Growing Up

Evan's growth and development seems to be on hyper drive lately. Just last week he was saying his first word, now he is saying several words, crawling so fast, starting to cruise, getting a tooth, turning pages in books, and learning to "throw" a ball. It is beautiful to see. What makes it all the sweeter is how much fun he seems to be having. He is so pleased with himself for each milestone, letting out little squeals of joy and precious baby babbles. Through it all, Evan remains a easy going, calm baby. I think we can now say with some confidence that Evan is an "easy" baby. He is also just as precious and loving as can be.

Birthday Boy

After weeks of anticipation, Benjamin turned 3 years old today! We had his party on Saturday at My Gym. I don't think it could have been any more fun, and I'm not sure how we are going to top this one. It was a fun crowd of folks including Carly, Phil, Juliana, Sarah, Bryn, Juily, Katherine, Roman, Pranit, R.J., William, Gavin, Mamaw, and many others. Benjamin did an excellent job at playing the birthday boy. The games included a puppet tent, bubbles, and the roller coaster ride. I'm pretty sure that most people were having a great time, and it was so much fun that I think we were all exhausted from laughing.

Benjaminisms

Benjamin has been hilarious lately. The other day he made up a game and had me try it. I clearly wasn't doing very well and he said, "I'm better than you". Trying to teach him appropriate social skills I said, "Well, that's not a very nice thing to say". He then said, "I'm better than you, please". I had a good chuckle and he later seemed to realize that this was pretty funny.


Ok, this one is pretty hard to describe in words, but I will give it my best. Benjamin was showing me with his arms that he loved me very much. He opened them so wide and said, "mommy, I love you this much, I love you around the whole world". Then he opened his arms up just a wee little bit and said, "Evan I love you this much". Clearly, love is quantifiable for a 2 year-old.


He is such an amazing child, and I am NOT biased!

Duck

Evan said his first word yesterday! He said, "duck". I was watching an educational video with him and when a duck came on I said, "duck, Evan, duck". Then I could swear that he said "duck" too. I thought maybe it was just a mild hallucination since I had limited sleep the previous night. Later on we were playing and I showed him a toy duck. After I said "duck", he repeated me! What a surprise, I totally didn't expect him to say a word so soon. Of course, he has been saying mama and dada off and on, and says "buh" for things that start with a b. I am so proud of my little baby moose. (by the way, I call him my baby moose).

Brothers

Now that Evan is getting mobile, he can start to play with some of Benjamin's toys. Benjamin has had a mixed reaction to this. For the most part he tolerates it very well. Although he is not eager to share, he usually does not scream "mine" or react in any other hostile way. He typically moves away from Evan, and if Evan continues to pursue him, Benjamin will find Evan an alternative toy to play with. I've encouraged Benjamin to interact more with Evan. Sometimes this is not done out of the desire to foster their relationship, but to distract Evan when he is fussy and I need to get stuff done. The other day I asked Benjamin to show Evan some animals in a book and Benjamin replied, "I can't, I'm busy eating my grapes". I sure hope he didn't learn the "I'm busy" response from us!


Benjamin has also been very loving toward his brother at times. He has spontaneously hugged him and told him that he loves him. He has also told Evan "its okay" when Evan is upset. Benjamin has shown signs of looking out for Evan like a big brother should. When Evan kept dropping his toys in the car, Benjamin made sure we knew that we should install a gate to prevent this from happening. I'm not really sure how this would work, but the intent and concern was definitely felt. I can just tell that these two are going to be good friends and I look forward to seeing their relationship continue to develop.

9 Months Today!

Y
es, Evan really is 9 months old today. He is showing us his personality more and more every day. Now that he is more expressive and mobile, he seems to be really loving life. That makes a mama very happy. Mind you, it is not all pure enjoyment, as sometimes he can be quite a handful. Lately, it is hard to feed Evan because he keeps grabbing for the spoon and it becomes a game to get it into his mouth. I've taken to getting out two spoons, one for me to feed him with and one for him to play with. He is also in the "Drop 'Em" phase, where he thinks it is fun to drop everything at the dinner table, including his spoon, my spoon, all types of food times (puffs and Cheerio's mainly), and his teething biscuit. The last two times in the bath, Evan has not wanted to sit. Instead, he crawls in the shallow water as if he is swimming. It does not bother him to get his face wet and he usually ends up with a bubble moustache. Of course, there is the usual difficulty of the baby wanting to pull up on all things that are, or are not, stable. He must be watched at all times.  

Evan wants to be part of the action. No matter what Benjamin is doing now, he always wants to be a part of it. This has started to be frustrating for Benjamin, as Benjamin is not used to having to share. Just tonight Evan was joining Benjamin in all activities. He wanted to see Benjamin's drawings at the art table, he enjoyed playing with the trains, and he was right there for the nightly book reading. You never would have known that Evan had a stomach bug today. He woke up sick for his 9-month birthday, but ended up having one of the best days of his life. God bless you Evan!

Oh Goodness!

This post is not really about how great the kids are and what all they have done lately. Its really just about me. We are almost at 9 months that I've stayed at home. Its hard to imagine where the time has gone. One thing that is for certain is that my life is so vastly different now than it ever was. I'm sure one day, when I'm back working in an office, I will look back and wish I was here again. However, today I am feeling overwhelmed and bogged down in the daily minutia that never seems to get smaller. I really do miss the maids, and I was a fool to ever tell them goodbye. I will never take for granted a totally clean house, especially one that wasn't cleaned by me! I have decided that I just need to let go of the idea that everything should be clean and free of any debris. It just doesn't happen around here! I'm sure it doesn't really happen in many other houses either.


I think the most important task for me right now is one that doesn't involve any real cleaning at all. I guess you could call it a figurative type of cleaning. I need to clean my head of all of the negative thoughts and complaints that are swarming around right now. I'm sure nobody wants to hear the litany of complaints that come spilling out of my mouth on a daily basis. At the top of the list is my bum knee, which really doesn't seem to get any better. How do I put mind over matter and not let the physical aches and disappointments bog me down? I should know this as a psychologist, and I probably could come up with a great answer....for someone else..... For now I will make an effort to focus on the positive, my cute little boys and the blessed life that I have. So if you hear me complaining (and I don't really know who you are since nobody reads this except my mom), slap me on the side of the head and tell me to buck up.


Lord give me the strength to overcome physical obstacles and the pains of daily living. Keep my eyes on what really counts; your love, your grace, and my children who depend on me.

Reflecting

Today I am feeling too tired to clean or do anything super-productive. I don't think I have ever taken a nap while Evan is sleeping and we are here alone. I just don't think I can relax enough. This morning while I was lying in bed, awake since 5 after Evan cried for a few minutes, I was looking at old pictures on my I Phone. I just melted when I came across pictures of Evan as a newborn and watched a short video clip of the two of us in the hospital. He seems to have crossed from being a baby baby to a big baby, if that makes any sense. I do have this feeling that we are leaving babyhood behind in this house, this time for good. I know that we will not have another, I will never have a little girl. I am happy with my boys, but sad when I think of them growing up and not being our babies anymore. I've always heard people speak of this feeling, but never had any idea what the experience might be until now, as I see Evan approaching the one year mark. I know relationships with mothers and boys are often not as close when they are older, as it might be with mothers and daughters. I just pray that I can keep my boys close for as long as possible, even when they are men.


Reflecting back over the past 8, almost 9 months, I immediately notice how much I have changed. Many of the obvious ways seem to be for the worse, as I take inventory of my body. I simply am not the person I was. I have hollows under my eyes that do not seem to go away if I get more sleep. When I look in the mirror I do not recognize myself, and I always look tired. My joints crack and pop whenever I get up and I am still nursing my injured knee. I don't know what happened to my hair, but I can not seem to do anything with it anymore. Most days, I do not wear make up and it doesn't really seem to matter. Its not that I used to be some incredible physical specimen with glistening hair, perfect skin, and a perfectly-functioning body. No, that's not it. Its just that I am not the same, and it takes some getting used to. Aside from the obvious physical changes that I often lament, and probably should stop complaining so much about, I do believe that I have made some positive changes. I'm pretty sure that I am tougher than I ever used to be, and I am quite sure that I don't take as many things for granted. I thoroughly appreciate a warm bath, a trip to the store by myself, or any time by myself for that matter. Having the second child has definitely made me more of a mother, if one can say that. I am fully immersed in motherhood, I eat, sleep, and breathe it. I am also certain that there is no greater joy that I could experience than being a mother to my two boys, seeing them laugh and play. This great love that I have for them draws me closer to God in ways that I am not awake enough to describe. It is the relationship with God that I have relied on, and will continue to pull strength from every day, and especially on those days when I think that I just can't do it. I can do it, I have done it, and I will do it. Amen.

Clapper

Evan clapped today! He did it spontaneously on two separate occasions. He didn't even know he was doing it, but he seemed to have fun!

The Boy Gets Around

Evan started crawling just recently and, let me tell you, he really gets around! Evan is fully into exploring mode and now that he can get to things, he has to get to everything. It seems that Evan is especially drawn to things that are off limits, like cords and sharp corners. Yes, it is definitely time for his parents to re-baby proof the house.


In other Evan news, he has FINALLY gotten to sleep in a real crib, now that we have moved Benjamin to his "big boy bed" (which is actually smaller than his crib). Evan seemed to take right to the crib, and appreciates having more square footage to explore. He now enjoys sleeping with a cozy blanket and smiles and kicks his legs when I tuck him in with it. He is simply too adorable!

8 Months Old

Evan turned 8 months on Friday, and I'm just getting around to posting! I guess that might tell you what a busy weekend it was. Its so crazy that the long weekend, which should be relaxing, seems extra-exhausting. It may be that we try to get so much done on the weekends, when Lance is here and things are more productive. Anyway, our littlest one is 8 months old, which feels like an impossibility! I can't believe how close he is coming to one year.


At the 8 month mark, Evan is pretty much crawling. He is able to move forward towards objects that he wants, and he is pretty fast. A combination of rolling over and scooting with his arms and legs gets him fairly mobile and he is much less frustrated. He is also pretty vocal, saying "mamama", "dadada", "babab", and "nanana". I swear he says those things discriminately sometimes, and I really think that he said "dada" to his daddy yesterday. He says "nanana" when he doesn't like something or is unhappy about it. Evan is a very curious little boy who constantly explores objects and loves to watch his big brother. He is also very excited about photography and enjoys looking at pictures of himself and his family as we go up and down the stairs. He is a budding foodie, savoring most foods. His favorites are squash (homemade baby food with a dab of butter and fresh herbs), peas, roasted peaches, and bananas. Evan can also feed himself puffs. In terms of his relationship with animals, Evan is friends with our cat, Ruthie. She does not mind that he pulls her hair out in large clumps.

Bonus Day

Lance had a 3-day weekend, which we were surprised about at the last minute when his boss called Thursday night. We set out to have a fun, yet productive Friday with our beautiful boys. The main project for the weekend has been making use of all of the wonderful digital photographs that we have recently gotten from Bloom Austin Photography. Of course, no productive weekend is complete without a trip to Costco. This particular trip was notable for two reasons. First, it was probably the least we have ever spent in a single trip. Second, Evan sat in the cart for the first time! As you can see from the photographs, he really enjoyed it. I was overcome with pride and thankfulness, seeing my two boys sitting in that card side-by-side.


After Costco we went shopping for Benjamin's bed and I think the boys were really getting tired. We wrapped up the afternoon with a trip to the Mighty Cone food trailer. Lance and I have been following the increasing popularity of food trucks/trailers, yet we have only been to one or two. Mighty Cone maked a good first start in our quest to become familiar with Austin's fine trailers. Crunchy chicken and shrimp with bright, fresh slaw and a spicy sauce, wrapped in a tortilla made for a delicious dinner in the 100 degree weather. We were a little too ambitious and went over to the Austin Trailer Park and Eatery to sample more trailer fare and some cake balls. We got a hot dog for Benjamin and sat down in the shade to feed Evan. Unfortunately, the cake balls will have to wait, as our stay was cut short by Benjamin's meltdown. All in all, it was a great bonus Friday.

A House Without Baba's

We finally took Benjamin's Baba's away, and it was long overdue. We have no one to blame but ourselves for any fallout that might be. That doesn't make it any easier, it makes it a little bit tougher. So I thought things wouldn't be too bad, which was probably just wishful thinking. I was wrong. It seems that he really did use them to soothe himself and he's had such a hard time settling down for sleep without them. The good news is that they are gone, all of them. We took Evan's away too. After all, he did not really seem to want them. I realized that I just kept putting them back in his mouth after he pulled them out. It is the end of an era. Now we are praying that Benjamin will soon learn to calm down and fall asleep in less than the two hours that it currently takes at night. He has pretty much stopped taking naps. Yes, that hurts a stay-at-home mommy as much as it might seem. I might have to settle for an hour-long "quiet time" if I want to get a shower or some exercise. Despite these problems, a house without Baba's seems somehow liberating and I know it will be better for all of us.

Evan Update

Evan is almost 8 months old. He is really getting around, despite not crawling yet. He rolls over to get things and goes from sitting to a crawling position. In fact, it seems like he will hardly sit at all anymore. Along with these changes has come a change in sleeping patterns. He has cut his naps in half and was really fighting sleep for a week or so. What I learned from Benjamin is that this is likely a phase and he will return to the good sleeper that we know. This is such a neat time in his life, as he rounds the corner and heads toward the one year mark. He has a sweet disposition and such beautiful blue eyes. I am so excited to see how he changes into a little boy. Go Evan!

The Bad Day, At Least Mostly

The day did not start out bad, really it didn't. The boys and I went for a lovely walk around the block and I'm pretty sure I actually felt a semi-cool breeze. Evan went down for his morning nap after just a few minutes of crying and Benjamin and I enjoyed a brief period of drawing with sidewalk chalk in the front yard. We hung out peacefully for a while and then went to Sprouts to acquire some baking materials. Evan sat in the grocery cart for the first time while Benjamin walked alongside me! If only I had brought my cell phone to take a picture. I was very proud of my boys, who were so well behaved. Then, the first sign that things might not be as good as they seemed, I realized that I had left the groceries in the cart in the parking lot! We were on our way to Benjamin's gymnastic class and, as you recall, I did not have a phone to call Sprouts! When I got to My Gym I borrowed their phone and called Lance, who called Sprouts to hold the groceries.


The class was really great and, to be fair, I can't really say that the entire day was bad. I enjoyed watching Benjamin be so independent in his class. He was the teacher's pet, sitting right next to him for most of the class and following his every instruction. Benjamin really did shine in that class and you could tell that he was feeling so good about himself. He even used to potty during the free time period and did an excellent job. He is always the first to sit in the circle when the music stops and it is "Circle Time".


Its on our way home that the bad day really began. See, the problem is that the class is at 11:45 and is over just before 1, when the boys have usually been put down for their naps. I had to stop at Sprouts to get the groceries that I had left, and the boys still needed to eat something before taking naps. So Evan started breaking down on the way to Sprouts and the next hour was rather stressful to say the least. Thankfully, Evan only cried for a few minutes before falling asleep. However, Benjamin never went to sleep. I rested and ate lunch for a few minutes before making the rather unwise decision to bake cupcakes.


Since I hadn't heard from Benjamin I assumed he was asleep. As I was getting ready to mix the dry ingredients into the eggs, I heard Benjamin's door open and somehow I knew this would not turn out well! I asked him to play quietly for 10 more minutes while I finished the cupcakes. Well, its hard to remember if you already put a teaspoon of salt in the batter when a 2 year-old is screaming and banging on his door. Then I heard Evan wake up after just a 30 minute nap. Uh oh! I went upstairs after putting the cupcakes in the oven. I walked in Benjamin's room and he requested to use the potty. I should have known by the smell that he had already gone but I told him to go ahead. Then I got Evan and headed downstairs to check on the cupcakes. That is when I fell down the stairs for the second time in two weeks. I screamed and cried for fear that Evan might be hurt and Benjamin started screaming too. I clung to Evan, who by the grace of God was okay. Then I went upstairs to calm Benjamin and he screamed that poop was all over the floor. Poor thing had taken off his pull ups to use the potty but they were already full of poop! I quickly cleaned up the poop and closed the bathroom door, then went downstairs to take the cupcakes out of the oven. Well, they did not look good! It was then I realized how much pain I was in. I thought I might have broken my tailbone. Sarah and Bryn were scheduled to come over in a few minutes. I took several tylenol and put a bag of ice on my derriere. Sarah was able to help me give Evan a bottle and we managed to have a good conversation. After she left I decided to try the cupcakes again, I was determined! Well, they failed a second time...... The rest of the day and evening was spent nursing my injuries (the knee is still recovering) and taking many a deep breath.


Thank you God for keeping Evan safe while his mother keeps falling, and thank you for the joys of seeing Benjamin grow. Please Lord, heal my injured body and restore me to my former self. Amen.

Busy Weekend

We had a long list of to-do's and, I have to say with pride, we got through about two thirds of it! It really is amazing how much you can pack into two days and manage to come out relatively unscathed. That is not to say that we are well rested or relaxed! We did end up doing some gardening, necessary household chores, trying out a new church, and grocery shopping. Especially considering my damaged knee, I feel pretty good about that list. Its also true that I get a little bit more done when a chunk of time is not spent exercising.


As far as fun goes, we got some of that in as well. Benjamin, daddy, and Evan braved the 100+ weather and did some sidewalk chalk. Evan seemed to enjoy it and generally just loves to be around with daddy and Benjamin doing some guy bonding. We got a picture of him sticking out his tongue, which is a very frequent activity for him these days. It is just too cute and too funny!


The biggest highlight of the weekend was the free concert at Sunset Valley Hall. We got to see a Cajun Zydeco band called "Doctor Zog". I had my doubts about the timing of the event, since it was right before bedtime and Benjamin had skipped his nap on Sunday. However, it was so much fun that it was even worth the wild time we had putting the boys to bed last night. Benjamin absolutely loved it and spent about half the time there dancing. There was a cute little 5 year-old girl with a princess red dress on and a tiara. Benjamin was particularly interested in her and, with daddy's prompting, asked her to dance! They danced for about 30 minutes or so and started pulling up strands of Bermuda grass, giving them to each other and to us like flowers. It was absolutely precious! Evan even got in on some of the fun and the little girl was quite fond of him.


Finally, it was also a weekend with firsts, as most of them are around here. It was Evan's first time to stay with someone besides us or the grandparents. We dropped him and Benjamin off at the nursery while we tried out a new church on Sunday. He did absolutely great and the ladies said he was a flirt. The concert also marked Evan's first live music event. May he have a lifetime of wonderful music to look forward to!

Recuperation and Renewal

After coming home from vacation, I needed a break. Before I could quite get my bearings back, I fell on the stairs and injured my knee. I don't mean to complain too much, but my knees have always been problematic, and that was not something I really needed. I have been hobbling around for almost a week, hauling my lame body up and down the stairs. The add more stress to the system, the boys and I got a cold. Thankfully, it was a pretty mild cold, but it did seem to make me feel very worn down. I started to feel like I have been tired and worn down since I had Evan 7 months ago. Now that I am feeling a little more like myself, I realize that it wasn't really true, just a temporary perspective. I have had periods of energy, especially associated with exercising and getting in shape.


After finally giving in and going to our room to lie down last night (before we put the kids to bed!), I texted the grandparents and invited them to take Benjamin tomorrow. I felt a pang of guilt, but reassured myself that I was sick and needed a break. I do SO love Benjamin, but recently he does take a lot of mental energy. I want to be able to respond to his needs in a calm and loving manner. I find that I am often disappointed by my responses, and that is even more tiring. So today is a day of rest, a day to reset. Evan is upstairs taking a good nap and I am taking some time for myself. I have plans, big plans. Its just a matter of picking one of them and seeing it through. Hopefully I will be posting images of my photo collage and various decorating projects in the near future. To be fair, let's shoot for the end of the year!


This is a reminder that we need to take care of ourselves in order to take care of others. I need this quiet mental space to renew my energy and be ready for Benjamin when he needs me. Its okay to ask for help and its okay to realize that you need a break. Now I just have to believe that and repeat it to myself daily. If only I could focus on the most important things, not getting bogged down in the minutia of daily life. This is probably God telling me that its time to get back to church and a Christ-centered way of life. Please God, help me to follow in your path and lead me into the light!

Our Big Boy

Today was the first day that Mr. Benjamin Vaughn did not need a diaper change. It seems hard to believe that he went all day using the potty, when just a few weeks ago I wondered when it would ever happen. He looked so proud of himself when we all congratulated him tonight. Yay Mr. Benjamin Vaughn!

7 Months

Evan is 7 months today! So much has happened since he turned 6 months! He has sampled so many new foods, gone swimming, been to the beach, flown on a plane, and vacationed in New Mexico. He is babbling, shrieking like a baby dinosaur, and trying to crawl (he can go backwards and in a circle). There aren't words or photos to capture what a sweet, dear, precious little boy he is. We are all so blessed to have him!

A Look Back

Phew! What a vacation! This was our first vacation with both boys! It was also Evan's first time at the beach and first time on the plane. Lance and I thought we would barely make it on the way home but it wasn't that bad. The boys were both very good but it was a chore hauling the car seats and luggage around. When we got home we were so exhausted. I am still trying to recover from vacation. Oh the irony! Can hardly wait for the next one ;)

On Vacation

I'll have to post pics later, but for now a brief summary will have to do. We are currently in New Mexico and daddy just arrived last night. The boys were so happy to see him! I was too. Benjamin has had such a great time here. Amma and Papa bought them so many toys, it is like Christmas in July. Cars, cars, and more cars with a truck or two thrown in. Benjamin has also enjoyed playing in the "pool" with his floaties and new boat toys. He has enjoyed it so much that he refuses to get out. I find myself saying, "if you can't get out when we ask you to, you can't go swimming anymore". Yeah, right! I wonder how many parents have said that over and over again, only to go back on it the very next day.


The beach was nice, but not quite as relaxing as I remember. In all of my 36 beach-going years, I believe this is the first one where I never really got in to it and felt beachy. Something about not sleeping well and having the two boys, going back and forth between naps and bathing suits, seemed to take my focus away from experiencing the now of the crashing waves and squaking seagulls. I feel quite sure I will get back some day, I just do miss it. However, it was nice seeing Evan stick sand and seaweed in his mouth with gusto and Benjamin feeling confident in the pool with his floaties. He's even been getting the water on his face when he jumps in (by himself!). Yay!


So I have been fully introduced to "vacationing" with two kiddos. Let me tell you, its a lot of work! The silver lining would be the fun that your kids have and the new things that they get to see. There are also those moments. You know, the ones where you finally get to relax and have a glass of wine before hitting the pillow at 10pm sharp :)

Big Day for Benjamin and a First for Evan

Benjamin had a 2-milestone day yesterday! It seemed to be just another ordinary Sunday, with plans to go to the pool, relax, and hopefully get one or two things done. However, there were just a couple of things that made this day pretty special.


I wanted Benjamin and Evan to get some time in at the pool as a warm up for the beach. We headed off to the Country Club after about an hour of getting ready. I remember thinking how much effort it took to get both boys and ourselves ready for swimming, when by the time we got to the pool it would be about time for their naps! I tried to relax and take some deep breaths. After all, what is the point of spending so much energy getting ready when you are not going to enjoy yourself? Evan took right to the water and didn't seem phased at all. He had a serious look for a while but finally loosened up and splashed around. Benjamin tried on his floaties and hopped in the pool. Much to everyone's surprise they helped him to swim and even jump in the water independently! What a fun surprise for us, and especially for him! Benjamin was so proud of himself and even said, "I'm doing great!". Mommy and daddy were doing even better when we enjoyed a Mai Tai, and we all split a $16 burger for lunch.


After a long weekend, Lance and I were looking forward to relaxing. We put the boys down for bed and were a bit disappointed when neither one of them went to sleep. After whining for a little while, Benjamin declared that he had to use the potty. I was pretty sure that this was simply a stalling tactic, and I'm still pretty sure that's what it was. But how could we turn down this opportunity? Benjamin actually asked to use the potty! Lance sat with him and read him a book while he sat on the potty. After a few minutes we decided to give him some privacy. Then we heard a shout; "I did it!". We came running, saw the pale yellow water, and scooped him up in our arms. We all rejoiced and savored the moment. Before having kids I would have NEVER realized just how significant and exciting the potty could be.

Ups and Downs

Evan went to his 6 month appointment and checked out healthy as can be. His stats were interesting though: 25% height and weight and 90% head! He is just like his big brother. Those brainy Vaughn boys! We went to a play date at Carly, Phil, and Juliana's. It was such a great idea, playing for the kiddos and drinking for the adults :) Also there was 8 month-old Bryn. Evan is a lucky guy, surrounded by two slightly older women. He admired one of Juliana's toys so much that she offered to loan it to him for a while.


On another positive note, Benjamin is back to his usual charming self after recent trips to the dark side (see previous posts). Life is SO much easier when he is his generally agreeable. He has also made important strides in other areas, like peeing on the potty (only at school) and singing the ABC song! In fact, Benjamin has really taken to singing lately and his two favorite songs are "The Wheels on The Bus" and the "ABC" song.


Really, the only down aspect of current life is my difficult sleeping. It seems to be connected to a number of things. First, I have always been a light sleeper. Now my ears are tuned in to any sound large or small, including baby whimpers, coughs, screams, my cat's meow, and my husband's snores. Once I am awake it is so hard sometimes to fall back asleep, especially due to some indigestion issues that I have been having. Being a mommy of two little ones is great, but it is all the more challenging when one is severely sleep deprived. I am proud of myself though, because somehow I made it through the day without anything ugly happening (car wreck, screaming at children, being late for Evan's appointment). I do remember praying last night, asking God to help me through it, and He did.

6 Months!

Evan turned 6 months over the weekend! I can't believe he is already half way to one year old! He is a great baby and he gets sweeter and cuter every day. Evan has been sitting up for about a month and can stay seated well for a long time now. He still loves to put anything in his mouth, and especially enjoys gnawing on our hands and fingers. Evan has been enjoying his daily oatmeal with banana or apple and he always gives a little cry when we are done, even if he has had plenty. Now Benjamin says, "you've had enough, Evan, you've had enough". It is hilarious! He is a really easy baby and we can take him to the grocery store or a restaurant in his car seat and he will sit there for a long time without complaining. He is now getting more hair on the top of his head, which makes him all the more cute and smoochable! He loves watching the butterflies in the garden and is an "outdoorsy" type. We love him!

In The High Chair

Evan got to sit in the high chair for the first time this week. He is such a big boy now! When I was pregnant with him I just knew that he would be a child who loves his food and it does seem that I was right. Evan has really taken to eating like a duck to water. So far he has tried sweet potato, bananas, and apples and likes them all. Evan does not like it when the eating ends. When he nurses, drinks a bottle, or eats solids, he will cry when I stop feeding him even if he has had an ample amount. That's my boy!

Sprinkler Fun

We've been enjoying just hanging out in the side yard in the evenings. As one might predict, Benjamin just loves to play in the water from the hose. The other evening daddy let him run around in the grass and get soaked! He had such a great time and did not want to stop. The only problem was his diaper, which does seem to have a limit when soaked with liquid. I just love those summer evenings!

Trying Times, but With a Dollop of Cuteness

We've all heard of the "terrible two's" but Lance and I did not think they would happen to us......until the last couple of months! Don't get me wrong, Benjamin is the sweetest, dearest, most perfect little boy in the world, but he has really worn me down over the past week. I often have to chase him around the living room just to change his diaper and he does not want to go anywhere. Of course, when he gets to where we are going he usually does not want to leave ;) Its as if he is trying on a different personality again, one in which he disagrees with everything. Now, just imagine if an adult acted like that- nobody would want to be around them! Lucky for Benjamin, he is so cute that you just take it and stick with it as best you can. So the whining and the constant "no's" and flip flops (I want this, no that, no this!), are definitely the least appealing aspects of Benjamin's current developmental phase. The other prominent aspect of this phase that is not infuriating, but can be challenging, is his tendency to ask frequent and repeated questions, especially while riding in the car. Let me tell you, I am getting creative at coming up with answers for these that minimize his chance of asking a follow up question! Changing the subject is also a good strategy.


Because I love him so much, I can't help but end this post with a flurry of positive comments about my little boy. Did I mention that he was extremely and utterly adorable?? We just got his hair cut and a little bit sticks up in the back so it almost reminds me of a little Indian feather. Of course, Benjamin is also extremely sweet when he wants to be. He has been hugging Evan and comforting him when he cries. He pats his little head and says, "Yes, Evan, its okay, yes". Then Benjamin just slays you with all of the amazing things that he is able to say. How many 2 year old's can say "metamorphosis" and "binoculars". He is also a fan of the natural world and enjoys looking for caterpillars, butterflies, and the moon.


In fact, its the trying times like these that make you realize just how much you love them. Despite wanting to throttle them, (only in the imagination!) the next minute you just want to kiss their little cheeks and hold them tight. These are the times you understand just what parenthood really means.

Two Boys Upstairs

I now have 2 little boys upstairs sleeping. We finally moved Evan upstairs and out of our bathroom yesterday. It felt so strange to have the monitor in our bedroom while we slept but it also felt good. Our bathroom seems so big now and I never realized how exciting it could be to step into our shower again. Evan seems to be adjusting very well and both boys have been sleeping for 1.5 hours!


We had a nice anniversary dinner last night. It was odd though, because it was the first non-fabulous meal that we have ever had at Uchi. We sat by a group of gnats and managed to get half of our meal comped just for mentioning this to the waiter. We had some salmon sashimi and a spicy tuna roll and then rented a movie on the way home. But the great thing about the evening was our conversation and the plans that we made. We are so blessed that God is working in our marriage.


So I showered, ate lunch, did laundry, and watched an episode of Lost. I don't think life gets much better than this. Oh wait, it does! I am looking forward to a great weekend at the Donaldson family reunion. We are going to Amma and Papa's house to see everyone this evening!

Sweet Benjamin

For the most part, Benjamin was an angel today. Although cranky after waking from his nap, he seemed to feel bad for being cross with mommy and tried to make up for it. He came into our room while I was resting and asked if I needed a hug. He then offered to get a bottle of formula for Evan "as soon as he wakes up". After returning with a bottle (that daddy helped him prepare) he asked if I needed a drink and took my empty water bottle to fill. It really was what I needed to feel better on a down day! Thank you Benjamin!

The Amazing Changing Baby

In the past few days Evan has gone through so many changes. I can't believe how many things have happened all at the same time. As I posted previously, he has rolled over and is sitting up. He is also laughing out loud, squealing, sleeping without being swaddled, and staying awake for longer periods between naps. He truly seems like a different baby! Evan has also learned to express himself in ways besides crying. When he likes something he laughs or squeals. When he doesn't like something he whines or protests vocally. What an exciting time in his life and in our family!

Rolling Over and Sitting Up

After weeks of intense practice, Evan learned to roll over for the first time! We were all very excited about his new accomplishment. To add to the excitement, he's also starting to sit unsupported for periods of time! If that wasn't already too much fun, he was laughing out loud with me the other night. Oh how fun! I just love this stage!

Happy Birthday to Mommy

Yesterday was a wonderful 36th birthday. Lance had jury duty at noon, so he stayed home in the morning and helped with the drip system. I sat outside nursing Evan and watching Benjamin water the plants (and himself) with the hose! We all had lunch, which included a homemade salsa and a fresh jalapeno from my garden. Yum!


In the afternoon, Benjamin and I headed to his first swimming lesson at the local YMCA. After first feeling like fish out of water, not knowing where to go and even if we had the right day for the class, we had a great time. Benjamin loved getting in the pool and did not want to leave. We practiced a drill over and over again. Benjamin would swim (with my help) to the side of the pool, climb out, throw his rubber froggie, jump off the edge (again with my help) and swim to get his froggie. I was so proud of him taking on something knew with such enthusiasm. I have a feeling he will be a great swimmer and I can't wait for the next lesson.


My birthday evening was nothing short of AWESOME! I met our friend Sankalp for a drink at his favorite bar, The Good Knight. It had such a neat atmosphere which seemed totally out of place in a seedy looking area of East Austin. It was dark with candles and old-fashioned photographs. The menu included upscale bar food and inventive takes on classic drinks. I tried the Strawberry Caiparinha with rosemary sage syrup. I enjoyed savoring this lovely beverage while Sankalp and I talked about the new trend toward using sustainable and local ingredients in cooking. We did miss Lance, who had to cancel at the last minute due to jury duty :(


After the Good Knight we headed to Jezebel's for dinner, where we met my parents and Lance. There was only one other couple at the restaurant early on a Monday evening and we just happened to know them: Mike and Jen! It was their 7th anniversary. Sankalp knows the chef at Jezebel and he came out to greet us. After a short interview about our culinary preferences, the chef prepared a 4 course menu full of wonderful surprises and incredible wine pairings. I can't remember all of the components of the dishes but I do recall that the main course featured seared wild boar (resembling a cross between ahi tuna and beef) served over osso bucco beef cheeks, avocado, a classic sauce with lobster and lamb stock and white truffle oil! Seriously, I have never had anything that wild in my life. I told the chef that he is the Salvador Dali of the culinary world. The man is truly talented! It was a great night with wonderful food, fabulous wine, and the enjoyment of loved ones. I don't really have to go into how I felt at 2:30 in the morning, do I?


Here's to a fabulous year at 36!

5 Months Old!

Evan turns 5 months today! Its hard to believe he is almost 1/2 a year old! The time has gone by so quickly. Overall, he is a pretty easy going baby and is generally a happy guy. His smiles have been so great lately, and he is a bit of a flirt. Its great that Benjamin has been so much more interested in his brother lately. He often asks to go with me to get Evan when he wakes up. Benjamin typically says, "hi Evan, how are you? Did you have a good nap?" Its so funny when he says, "its nice to meet you Evan". Evan also enjoys his brother. He reaches out to him with a wide open mouth, wanting to explore him like everything else these days. Evan is close to sitting up and rolling over, and he is very good with his hands. He has been great going to sleep by himself when we put him down awake. I can't wait to see what happens over the next few weeks with all of the big milestones coming up around the corner!

Let the Good Times Roll

I haven't posted a lot lately but I don't want to leave out some of the highlights of the last couple of weeks. Much of our energy has gone toward making our backyard a delight. We have had many encounters with nature and are enjoying the caterpillars, butterflies, birds, and plants. Several of the neighbors have even stopped by for a tour. Papa said we should put labels on our plants and charge admission! I think we might be featured in "Central Texas Gardener" someday! The boys have gotten to spend lots of time with their grandparents since we have needed babysitters while working in the yard. Benjamin got his first kite and was having a great time flying it with Papa.


Aside from the awesome outdoor adventures, we are having a great time enjoying our boys. As usual, Benjamin is wonderful and is always entertaining us. He does go through some phases where he tries on an alter ego. I won't go into details, just imagine the opposite of really sweet and charming ;) The good thing is that it only lasts a day or two and then our sweet little boy is back. Thank the Lord!


Since turning 4 months, Evan is really working on turning over and sitting up. He is much more interactive and really smiles at those who come to see him. As you can tell from his pictures, he is obviously very cute! We are very proud of him and he is a fabulous addition to our family.


We have also been anticipating the arrival of Uncle Link and Cousin Lyndie. They are staying for a little over a week and we have tons of fun planned for their visit. It will be the first time they meet Evan. Benjamin loves uncle Link and has been excited all day about his arrival at our home. The culmination of the visit should be our "Pergola Party" on Saturday. We have invited friends and family to share in our joy!

Solid Food!

Evan had his first "solid" food on Saturday! We mixed rice cereal with mama's milk and he seemed to take to it quickly. After a few moments of confusion and pushing it out of his mouth, he realized that it belonged in his tummy and finished the entire serving. I have a feeling Evan is off to a great start and a lifetime of fabulous eating!

What a Weekend!

This was the most fun I've had since before being pregnant with Evan! We started off with a date night on Friday and went out for Sushi. We had some fabulous roll with strawberry on top. Then we went to Max's Wine Bar to use the gift card that Lance has been toting around since last Father's Day. We ordered a nice bottle of wine and brought one home. It was great conversation over a cheese plate. Then we remembered that Blue October was the next night and we hadn't gotten any tickets! Lance had to find some on Craigslist and drove downtown late Friday night to get them. Saturday we hit Sazon for some authentic Mexican food on the way to the concert. Lo and behold, we ran into Amma and Papa, who must have been following us! The concert was great fun and BO played all of our favorites!


If that wasn't enough, the next day was Mother's Day and Lance let me take a nap while he did the dishes and took care of the boys! When I woke up from my nap Benjamin handed me a homemade card and said, "Happy Mother's Day!". It was the first time that he has said this (since he wasn't talking that much last year), and I was incredibly touched. He later said it again spontaneously. Later that evening we packed up the boys and headed for dinner at the Four Seasons. When we got there Amma, Papa, Granmom, Grandad, and Mamaw were waiting for us. The dinner was FABULOUS, perhaps one of the best meals of my life. To top it all off, the boys were very well behaved during the 3-hour dinner. We had so much fun (and so much wine) that we even thought we might want to have another baby ;)

Daddy's Home!

Its always great when daddy finally comes home after a long day. Benjamin just gets so excited, and so do I. I don't think Evan has figured it out yet, but I'm sure he will in the next few months. It is so beautiful to see Lance with his two boys, and I know he is very proud of them!

A New Life

As Evan's 4-month birthday has come, I have begun to feel even more adjusted to my new life. I have tried on once uncomfortable new shoes, and they are now beginning to mold to my feet. Since Evan has been sleeping 10 or more hours at night on a more regular basis, I feel much more energetic and have more to invest in activities other than those geared toward just getting through the day. For instance, I did join a mother's group (South Austin Fun Moms) and went out for dinner with a few of the ladies last week. I plan to make it for more activities in the coming weeks. I have also gained more confidence in outings with the boys, and was particularly proud of a trip to Costco last Friday. Let me tell you, Friday at noontime that store is totally hopping! Benjamin and I got our haircut on Monday. It was my first since before Evan was born and it was badly needed! Pam, a family friend for over 20 years, came to our house and was able to cut our hair under the pergola on a beautiful spring day!


Benjamin returned to school 2 days per week. I posted this picture of him in his cute outfit before heading off to school. He seems happy about it and I think it is really going to work for all of us. It gives me a little more time for myself when Evan naps, and a little more time to spend bonding with Evan. Benjamin gets a chance to make friends and to prepare for school. He feels comfortable and safe with Brandi and David and we are very thankful for that. We trust that this is a very positive environment for him, and the daycare was recently voted best in Central Texas by a local TV station!


I almost forgot an important part of the new life. I have begun exercising again and I am doing the "30 Day Shred" workout program by Jillian Michaels (Biggest Loser show). It really kicks your ****! The great thing about it is the short length of the program- only about 25 min, which really helps me to fit it in to the daily routine. Yes, it is daily, and I plan to follow through with it. I will update my progress periodically.


I'm sure it will have its ups and downs and everything won't always go according to plan, but I really am starting to enjoy staying at home with 2 boys and I pray every day that I am the best mom that I can be.